Listening to the Darkness

Romi Gonen’s account of sexual violence in captivity is not only an indictment of Hamas, but a warning against denial - and the demand for a redemptive script

*Trigger warning: sexual violence

This evening in Israel, Uvda- Ilana Dayan’s exceptional investigative program on Keshet 12- aired the second part of Romi Gonen’s harrowing testimony about her captivity in Gaza. The interview ranks among the most disturbing accounts to emerge since October 7.

In the first episode, broadcast last week, Gonen described the sexual assaults she endured as a hostage. In this second part, she goes further, recounting details that are almost impossible to absorb. She reveals that Izz al-Din al-Haddad, commander of Hamas’s Gaza Brigade, learned - while she was still in captivity - that she had been sexually assaulted. Haddad then ordered his men to arrange a phone call with her.

During that call, Gonen says, he demanded that she describe the assault in detail. He then offered her a deal: her silence in exchange for being placed at the top of the list of hostages to be released.

Here’s a short clip released by Uvda from this interview:

According to her, on the day of her release, al-Haddad was waiting in the vehicle that took her. “He said, ‘Do you remember our promise? Here- you’re being released first.’ Then he said, ‘Do you remember your promise to me? I hope you will keep it.’ I told him, ‘I will keep the promise,’ and there our paths parted forever.”

This testimony is enormously important. It demonstrates that Hamas’s most senior echelons were fully aware that hostages were being sexually abused. These were not isolated incidents.

It also shows that the effort to silence the victims was systemic and coordinated. The attempt to erase their voices stretched from the gunmen of Gaza all the way to so-called human-rights organizations that sought to downplay, outright deny, or simply ignore the systematic sexual abuse carried out by Hamas. Hostages who returned have described, in one form or another, physical and psychological torture throughout their captivity. From starvation to humiliation to sexual violence, men and women alike were subjected to abuse across the Gaza Strip - held by different factions, in different locations, above ground and below, By Hamas terrorrists or famillies, in apartments and in tunnels.

Gonen’s brave testimony obligates us to confront what the return of these hostages means for Israeli society and for the Jewish community. What they bring back with them is not only trauma, but truth. Fully listening to that truth - without euphemism and without denial - is part of the moral test of this moment.

Allow me to be clear: Israelis and Jews around the world often want to hear a particular story from the hostages- a single, coherent narrative of rebuilding, return to life, victory, and inner strength preserved. And while this is true for many of the hostages, and while the desire for such a narrative is understandable, it is not the whole truth.

All of the hostages went through a terrible, unimaginable ordeal - a tragedy that will live with them forever. No Jews since the death and concentration camps have endured what these men and women suffered in terms of abuse, psychological terror, and physical violence. In her interview, Gonen said as to the abuse she suffered: “…People don’t ask that question. I wouldn’t ask it either if I were them. I also think that no one asks mainly because no one wants to hear the answer.”

We should be careful not to demand that they conform to a redemptive narrative, to support a story of inspiration and resilience, while leaving too little space for acknowledgement, solidarity, and identification with their suffering. Inspiration cannot come at the expense of recognition. Their truth comes first. Listening to the darkness is hard, but is essential.

I am not writing this to diminish the miraculous capacity many hostages showed: their ability to retain inner strength, to maintain a unified front against their captors, even to hold on to Jewish traditions in Hamas tunnels, or to begin rebuilding their lives. Those moments matter deeply.

This is their story to tell, in their own way and in their own time. Without fully acknowledging the sufffering they went through, we will not be able to see the real meaning, and the moral reckoning that their testimony demands.